And So It Begins...

Hey everyone! Destiny here. Just wanted to give a little background to my name! I was born in Alexandria, Louisiana, grew up in Metairie, and now reside in Baton Rouge where I attend LSU. For starters, we have to go all the way to the beginning. You could say where it all began.

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To skip over a novel of a story, I'm adopted. The best part, I'm adopted by my grandfather and step grandmother. Growing up, not many of my friends and peers knew I was adopted, which looking back, was a blessing in disguise as it probably prevented a lot of teasing and unwanted questions. Aside from the additional question of curiosity here and there, I never really felt alienated from my peers because of my adoption. At least not until third grade. I remember vividly being told by one of my classmates, "You were only adopted because your mom didn't love you". Although hurt people hurt people, back then, I took those words and shoved them deep inside, not realizing that would stem a whole new level of emptiness later on in my high school years.

The point of this really, is that my life as an adopted child has been nothing short of what any child would receive from their birth parents, but that words hit like daggers to the heart that leave behind wounds that just reopen over again later on. Just like my little backstory as to why I don't sing.

"You can't sing."

-second grade; same classmate as last time

I haven't sang in public since.

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Fast forwarding through my years of middle school dance team and transitioning to high school. You know, where everyone tells you "these will be the best four years of your life!". For me, although they promoted a tremendous amount of growth for me, I can easily say high school was some of the darkest times of my life thus far. By the end of my senior year, I had seen first hand just how much a strong, supportive friend group could save your life, that when you dig yourself a hole you can always build a ladder to climb out, all suffering is temporary, nothing is really that big of a deal, and status isn't everything. In fact, it really means nothing. Looking back on those years, memories are now nostalgic, but at the time, all I could think was, "thank God it's over."

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Moving onto college brought me so much opportunity that truly allowed me to embrace my true self, to prioritize what meant most to me, and to swallow some really hard pills.

Hard Pills (to name a few):

- People are full of themselves, and frankly, they don't care enough to obsess over what you are doing or what you look like. Leave the house without makeup on, settle for things you can afford, and everyone trips up the stairs (so stop replaying it in your head days later.. no one cared).

- Some people were put into your life to teach you what you could live without. Those gut feelings? Listen to them.

- At the end of the day, that one test or quiz won't ruin your chances of being employed years later, so if it's 2am, close the laptop and go to bed.

- Expecting other people to make you happy or fill a void is not only unfair to you because it will never happen, but impossible for them because that is not their purpose. You are responsible for your own happiness and surrounding yourself with others who are HAPPY THEMSELVES. Also. Happiness is not an overnight thing, nor is it paired with people, places, or things. It's a choice that can be chosen at any time in any state.

- If you don't ask, it's a no. Asking for help doesn't make you weak or incompetent. It shows humility knowing that you don't know everything and are willing to be receptive to feedback.

In college, I was able to build an identity for myself. I'm currently a Marketing, Professional Sales major, third year member of the LSU Golden Girls dance team and LSU Tiger Band, second year member of Delta Gamma Sorority (DO GOOD!), member of one of the most fulfilling and supportive bible studies, and so much more. I am unapologetically myself, and I've learned to be a go getter that will always do better.

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With so many years ahead of me, I'd like to set some goals:

1) Say yes to myself more.

2) Be more vocal about what goes on inside my head and heart. (if you don't express how you feel to others, you'll always feel misunderstood)

3) Just do it. ("Tomorrow" is an empty promise to rectify fear and lack of discipline)

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Until next time..

XO,

Des